I don't have a Life

I really am annoyed with the encounter of meeting old friends

1. I don't know what to talk about
2. I rarely like to talk about my past( I think I have throw it away)
3. I'm not used to the crowd places
4. I go out just to have fun 
5. I want to go out to forget about the problem (I really do)
6. I have no idea what to talk
7. I kinda a boring person to talk with.
8. I can live on my on if my chain not attached to anyone
9. I feel like I'll kill somebody ~( I really do if I set on my mind)

to sum up, my life is worthless ~
why?
huh.. my movement is being watched ! *@*^k !
I need to experience it !!!!!!!!!!!!!
What can i do if i have wall without my own will !

I want to know hardship ! I want !